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Unsolvables - by theLadyGreenLeaf

Edited by Aragorn Elissar

theLadyGreenLeaf;
1. What would chairs look like if our knees bent the other way?
2. If a turtle loses his shell, is he naked or homeless?
3. Why are there locks on 24-hour convenience stores?
4. Are birdies taking over the earth and why are they doing it?
5. What is your cat smoking while you're not around?

Lady-of-Rohan;
6. How come people sterilize the needle before they give someone a lethal injection?

Tar-Atanamir;
7. Why is there no other word for "thesaurus" or "synonym"?
8. Why is abbreviation such a long word?
9. Why are water biscuits so dry?
10. Why isn't a 4X4 vehicle just called a "16" vehicle?
11. What does "acronym" stand for?
12. Why can't you buy inessential oils?
[editor adds- how come the word for big is small and small is bigger?]

Lady-�owyn;
13. How do you measure a year in the life?
14. How do you solve a problem like Maria?
15. How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
16. How do you find a word that means Maria?
17. Why are there so many songs about rainbows?
[editor adds- How come no one could stop that ram (bam) butting a hole in the damn?

StevenSpielburgJr;
18. Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
19. Why do kamikazi pilots wear helmets?

kiplingkat;
20. Why does nothing rhyme with "Orange"?
[if an orange is orange, why isn't a Lime called a Green? Or a grapefruit called a Yellow?- Editor]
21. How does my car and my pets know exactly how much I have in my bank account?

theLadyGreenLeaf adds;
22. If the human brain were simple enough for us to understand, then wouldn't we be too stupid to understand it?
23. If pro is the opposite of con, then isn't progress the opposite of congress?

Lady-�owyn;
24. Why did the chicken cross the road?
25. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

fernie lotz in philosophical mode adds;
26. If teeth is the plural of tooth, then why isn't the plural of phonebooth: 'phonebeeth'?
27. Why do pyjamas have pockets?
28. Did Adam and Eve have a belly button?
29. Why do some people wake others just to ask if they were sleeping?
30. How do you write 'zero' in Roman numerals?
31. Why do people press the remote control button even harder when it's battery is weak?

GaugeMistress;
32. Do seeing eye dogs ever get frustrated because there's no one around to watch them do tricks?

RKleeburg;
33. How come your feet smell and your nose runs? Shouldn't your feet run and your nose smell?

theLadyGreenLeaf;
34. Why do women's boxer shorts have holes in the front? (maybe we don't want to know...)

Lady-of-Rohan;
35. How come Magic Johnson isn't best known for his johnson?

Lady-�owyn;
36. Why can't money buy me love?

NastyBoy;
37. Why does the word "lisp" have an "s" in it?
38. Why is it called a building if its finished being built?
39. Why is it called a TV set when there is only one of them?
40. If Geronimo jumped out of a plane what would he yell?
41. Would the ocean be deeper if there were no sponges?
42. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
43. Why is pants plural and brassiere singular?
44. When you buy styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

theLadyGreenLeaf;
45. If they were shipping crates what would they pack them in?

Bellbird;
46. If lawyers are debarred
47. And clergymen defrocked
48. Would electricians be delighted
49. If cowboys are deranged
50. Would cashiers be distilled
51. And would ladies of the night be delayed...

Tolkien Junkie (displays an earlier obession of hers);
52. Why was the Mystery Machine always smoky and foggy when Shaggy and Scooby got out of it?
53. Why were Shaggy and Scooby so hungry all the time?
54. Why did Freddie always take Daphne and Velma and leave Scooby and Shaggy all alone? sometimes he just took Daphne...
55. Why were the bad guys in Scooby Doo always wearing masks but always looked real?
56. Why does the rain in Spain stay mainly in the plain?

Aragorn Elissar adds;
57. Why did Scooby always put an "R" infront of every word (except Scooby dooby do)?
58. why was it always the fairground owner?
59. why would they have gotten away with it if it hadn't been for those pesky kids?

damianarlyn;
60. Why do we call it "shipment" when it goes by car and "cargo" when it goes by ship?
61. Why is there no blue food?
62. Why do we call it a "near miss" instead of a "near hit?"
63. Who do doctors go to when they're sick?
[erm, they go to other doctors? - editor]

coolbananas;
64. Why do we say a pair of glasses when there is only one?
65. Who framed Roger Rabbit?
66. Did Superman design his own outfit?
[more importantly, why did he wear his briefs on the outside? was that to prevent skid marks (if he crash landed)? - editor]

greenleaf 4;
67. Is there, is there balm in gilead?

NastyBoy;
68. Why do the words oversee and oversight mean opposite things?

fernie lotz;
69. Why do people keep on pressing the elevator button when they're in a hurry?

Aragorn Elissar;
70. why do english people abroad think that simply repeating the same english statement, but louder, will make them understood, to someone who doesn't speak english?
71. Why does your chewing gum lose it's flavour on the bedpost overnight?
72. why is more than a handful a waste?
73. if a tree fell over in a forest and no one was there to hear it, would it make a sound?
74. why is it that you always find what you are looking for in the last place you look?
75. why is there no name for the long lost item you find unexpectedly, when you are searching for something else, that completely makes you forget what it was you were searching for in the first place?
76. Isn't it ironic that Alanis Morrisette can't tell the difference between irony and misfortune?
77. Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime your are near?
78. Why do people say "beauty is in the eye of the beholder"? Have you seen the inside of an eye? eww!
79. Why do women always try to get into the smallest clothes they can find?
80. Why do women always ask us men, "Does my ass look big in this?"